Courting Disaster

Today I have been assigned the task of visiting my local magistrates court to find a story.

This may seem like a simple enough task, but in my world nothing is ever simple. Let me explain...

After several minutes attempting to persuade my father's resolutely sluggish and disobedient laptop to connect to the internet, I managed to establish that my local magistrates court is, in fact, in an adjacent town. Silly me! Who would be so stupid as to expect a court for one area to actually be in that area?

After further research I had also managed to ascertain that my destination weas reachable by bus, and duly set off.

This was when the trouble began.

I boarded the bus and made my way to the nearest available seat, slumping into it gladly. Unfortunatly for me, the seat had somehow and inexplicably detached itself from the vehicle. As a result, I catapulted rather ungracefully into the aisle.

As if this wasn't embarrassing enough, an elderly lady, sporting a blue-rinse perm and an array of frankly hideous clothing, had the audacity to laugh at me!

Fuming, I regained my composure and moved to the seat next to me while shooting menacing looks at the cackling witch.

When the bus at last pulled up at my stop, I deboarded gratefully and entered the magistrates court, whereupon I was informed by a slightly scruffy attendent that there was no public gallery.

'Ummm, I think you'll find there is,' I said witheringly (I get irritable when my elders belittle me in public).

Finally, a woman with half an ounce of sense and professional training approached and confirmed that, yes, there was a public gallery, but that the trials did not begin until 2p.m.

This left me with almost three hours to spare! So I made my way to the nearby library, resolving to adopt an uncharacteristically studious persona for the remainder of the morning and get some other work done.

This studious persona lasted approximately half an hour, following which I cooed at an alarmed mother's baby, updated my MySpace account and consumed enough food in the library cafe to feed someone of at least four times my body weight.

I am now uncomfortably full, freezing cold (as usual) and becoming extremely drowsy. Only an hour to go until the trials begin - I'm off to the celebrity autobiography department...